"It's a book!!" They said.

"Your book is now in print!" The email said. Finally, after two years of reading, re-reading. Editing. Reading. Changing some more, it was done.

You would have thought I'd be filled with joy and excitement. Kind of like when I had my babies. And I did. But I also had some misgivings and doubts. Just like when I had my babies.

What if they don't like it? What if they don't like how I described them? What if I don't like it? All self doubts. But then, it arrived. I was thrilled to hold it in my hands. It looked so different to see the print on the book page rather than the computer screen or typed out on white paper.

It's a book. But of course, I've only begun. I need to market it now. Convince other people to read it. Write more. I've already gotten some ideas.

Raising a book, like a baby, is a lifetime thing!

Here's the baby--er-- book!

Wedding Day, August 16, 2008

Today is a special day of remembrance for me. No, it is not 2008, it is 2012 and today would have been  our fourth wedding anniversary, had Blair lived.

Instead I am remembering this day by myself. I am not alone, though, for the One who brought us together is here with me. And I have my blessed memories to recall. Blair was my beloved Boaz and I'll tell you more about Boaz another time. Blair loved me in spite of my flaws--and treated me with courtesy, respect, and love. He was a gentleman who did things for me just because he loved me and wanted to please me. He was a dreamboat of a man and I was so blessed to meet him, fall in love with him, and marry him.

Some people have asked me, "Would you have married him, had you known he'd be gone in such a short time?"

I say, I'd marry him again in a hot minute! We had a seventeen month honeymoon. How many people can say that? Not many, I'd venture to say.

I have wonderful memories and I know I will see Blair again in eternity. But here, on Earth, I have more family to love. I have two more sons--and a new granddaughter, Meghan Elena.

Happy anniversary my love. I am grateful to God for His gift to me of you-- if only for a time......

I hope the joy is as evident as we felt!

Delight in our first kiss as Mr. and Mrs. Graybill

                                               












                       

Mrs. Grumpy-skirt

Yes....that's what I called myself yesterday morning. You see, I was disappointed I didn't get "the call" I was waiting for. I wish I would learn to always be thankful and grateful for my situation. But I am not. I woke up grumpy and it continued throughout the day. In spite of being with four of the seven of my greatest joys. I have so much....yet I yearn for more. But I pulled myself up off of my pity couch, packed my backpack and went to meet my Vancouver family for a hike. It had its challenges too.

1. I forgot my hiking shoes, so had to hike in my tevas (it worked fine). 2. We took the wrong turnoff and wended our way up the winding road meandering through beautiful trees. But the curvy road made one grandchild sick--good thing there was a container there to catch the sickness. 3. Had our hike in cloudy, hazy Oregon and at the top, were greeted by the sun. Yay!

I finished my day with a movie and dinner with a friend--still feeling sorry for myself.

 I  woke up this morning with a sigh and a similar attitude as yesterday and read this verse from an ancient prophet. It was a good reminder for me Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. (Habakkuk 3: 17-18). OK, God. I get the message.

Dear Lord, help me with my attitude and help me rejoice in You. 

It IS better to rejoice and than grump. Here we go, Lord........

Just another reason to rejoice!