Coming home...
I'm still not past the disappointment of coming home. After a great weekend with several friends and meeting new people, enjoying the beautiful Haystack Rock at Cannon Beach, I come home and it's a let down! Why does this happen? I am without my partner! There's no one to remark about how the grass has grown really high. The fuchsias need some watering. At least my sweet mystery person has taken care of my trash cans (is it you, Nick?)  No one really cares if I'm home or not. I have to come to the conclusion that that's the way it is.....What do I do? I carry on! I drag my suitcase up the stairs. Get into my jammies and head for bed!

I give thanks as I lay my head on my very familiar pillow, sleep on my wonderful mattress, and am grateful for HOME!

Though I miss my sweet Blair and companion. Though I miss that special someone who cares if I'm home or not, I know my Heavenly Father in Heaven cares......I am blessed!

Birthdays and bits of wisdom.....

May 1. May Day. But also Annabel Elizabeth Sagert's eighth birthday! I vividly remember when Annabel made her entrance into the world. She didn't waste any time getting here. She still doesn't waste time. If she sees something needs to be done, she takes care of it. Sometimes a little too quickly!

I was talking with a new acquaintance this weekend and she said she didn't think my daughter and I look alike. That made me feel a bit sad, for I would like a little mark of myself in my children. But then she piped up, "But Annabel looks like you!" Ah. Annabel is like me in other ways too. Just as she takes care of things when she thinks they need to be done, so do I. Sometimes too quickly. Some things need time to fix.....like a broken heart...I'm working on that one right now. And trying to take the time for it to mend.

I will try to influence that little granddaughter of mine to take time in some things....and get things done quickly when that is the thing to do. Precious granddaughter, happy birthday!

Grammie and Annabel, August, 2011

Lessons learned

There was great happiness and excitement. Several hours later, shock, sadness, loss. Death of a relationship. Such was my experience last week. One hour I was happily planning a wedding. Three hours later, the plans were cancelled.

How can that happen? I'm sure that's what the followers of Jesus thought when only four days after they joyfully watched their Savior ride a donkey while people shouted "Hosannah!" later watched Him struggle to carry His cross to a place called Skull. Watched Him suffer and die. Be placed in a tomb. But three days later, the tomb was empty for He had risen!

I can't totally compare my experience with that of Jesus. But there are some similarities. Joy. Acceptance. Rejection. A changed future. I'm waiting for the next step. Still trying to process. Yet I have hope I will learn what I need to learn. My future on this earth is uncertain, but my eternity is certain and the best is yet to come. This I know for sure: I am not alone, for I have that same risen Savior walking beside me.

Gift of Life Award

This Tuesday afternoon, Jonathan, Erika, Andrew, Caleb, my friend Connie, and myself will drive north to Olympia to receive an award given to six families every year for their family member's gift of life to another. Blair Graybill gave life to two different people who needed a kidney. I wrote the following for publication:

How can one write only one paragraph to give tribute to a man? Blair Graybill was a one of a kind man. Bright, kind, inquisitive hazel eyes, framed by wire rimmed glasses, Blair Graybill had personality that made you want to trust him. His full head of silver hair gave him authority. He loved to learn and he never stopped the pursuit. While some teachers will rest on what they’ve learned, Blair never stopped. Teaching for over 30 years, he never grew tired of studying our American history. Blair loved his family even more. He was extremely proud of his two sons. He was the family organizer of reunions, and family genealogy. There were many people in his life who deeply respected him. Myself, his children, colleagues, and family. Blair was a gracious and kind man who was confident enough and manly enough to be helpful with most anything. When Blair decided to do something, he’d already analyzed the problem and was ready to do it. Though he left no directive regarding donating his kidneys, I believe he would have analyzed the situation, then would have decided to give. Blair loved me, his family and of course his late wife, Pat. I was blessed to know him and be a part of his life--and I know I will see him again--in heaven--because of his faith, a strong component in his life. He died, trusting in Jesus Christ for his salvation. I was blessed to know him and honored to have his name.

So, together, Blair's son, step-daughter, step grandsons, wife and friend will accept the award from Governor Gregoire. The greatest honor is to Blair. We love you!

Writing a book.....

I have a new appreciation for writers and the work they do in producing a book.  I have completed nearly every step in producing a book.

I've just dropped off a hard copy to my editor for one final read-through and I will be done. Never did I realize how many times one has to write, re-write, cut, and cut more precious (to me) words! But I believe it is worth it. I feel good that I've accomplished this.

Here's a little excerpt from the final chapter:

Dear reader, I have taken you on a journey. My journey of five years, full of joy, happiness, and sorrow. I pray that mostly you can see the joy, for there is none without God. Good times that don’t last and sad times visit us all.

But God, who shows Himself through Jesus Christ, knows our sorrows. He is there. Seek Him........

         

The other day, the phone rang. Someone from the Gift of Life Center Northwest was on the phone. She called to tell me that the State of Washington awards six families per year for their loved one’s gift of life. Would we want to participate and receive the award?  She went on to explain the governor from our state would give an award to each family. What an honor and tribute to Blair! Of course we would want him to be here, but that his two kidneys gave life to two men makes it easier to bear. So on February 28, 2012, we will be there with five other families to accept the award. And Blair Graybill will the most honored for it was his gift. I am so thankful that though this is an honor, his greatest honor is his life in heaven with his Lord and Savior.

As Greg(Blair's oldest son) said in a Sunday sermon, “Put God at the center of your life now, so that when everything else falls away--as it will---you will still possess the vital center.”

He is the center of my life. He has provided. He is trustworthy and good. 

G. William Rudberg, Jr. 9-26-1943 - 3-3-2006

Bill entered Heaven's gates this day at 3:00 am six years ago. Hard to believe it has been that long, yet it seems like forever.

Thank you, Bill Rudberg for your love and the life we had. Never would I have rappelled off of Rooster Rock (let alone a 6 foot high rock) had it not been for you and your encouragement. I wouldn't have climbed a mountain (Mt. Hood, six times!). Taken flying lessons. Gone on a car rally, hike 20 miles in one day! You inspired me to press on and it has helped me since you've been gone.

Thank you for the children we had together. They are good! Very, very good!

I wonder what you're doing in Heaven. It's hard to know for sure, but I know you are with the Savior and you are perfect. Thank-you, God, for the gift of Bill.

Henry Blair Graybill II, 11-12-1944 - 01-31-2010

How can one write only one paragraph to give tribute to a man? Blair Graybill was a one of a kind man. Bright, kind, inquisitive hazel eyes, framed by wire rimmed glasses, Blair Graybill had personality that made you want to trust him. His full head of silver hair gave him authority. He loved to learn and he never stopped the pursuit. While some teachers will rest on what they’ve learned, Blair never stopped. Teaching for over 30 years, he never grew tired of studying our American history. Blair loved his family even more. He was extremely proud of his two sons. He was the family organizer of reunions, and family genealogy. There were many people in his life who deeply respected him. Myself, his children, colleagues, and family. Blair was a gracious and kind man who was confident enough and manly enough to be helpful with most anything. When Blair decided to do something, he’d already analyzed the problem and was ready to do it. Though he left no directive regarding donating his kidneys, I believe he would have analyzed the situation, then would have decided to give. Blair loved me, his family and of course his late wife, Pat. I was blessed to know him and be a part of his life--and I know I will see him again--in heaven--because of his faith, a strong component in his life. He died, trusting in Jesus Christ for his salvation. I was blessed to know him and honored to have his name.