Worrying and Obsessing--Sister Sins

The past five months have been a whirl. I met a wonderful man named Jim. We fell in love and immediately started making plans to join our lives together. We purchased a house. Planned a wedding that we wanted to be simple--and found small or large, weddings aren't simple! We remodeled the new house to fit our needs. Combined two households of furniture and "stuff" which was a joint combination of 80 plus years of marriage! We planned. Worked. Made a schedule of what to do each day. Between these details, we had children and siblings to meet--Jim has seven siblings, I have four. Grandchildren --18 total--to interact with. Oh yes, there was Christmas to fit in there too! We've done pretty well with this extra added into our lives, yet  both of us were beginning to feel very stressed.

I was taken with a devotional I read last week about "sister sins":  worrying and obsessing. I'm a planner. Always have been. I learned it at my mama's knee. I think the planning is fine. Obsessing and ruminating about those plans over and over is unhealthy. Ok, LORD. I need to keep in mind the Scripture from the ancient poet, David: But my eyes are fixed on you, O Sovereign LORD; in you I take refuge.......Psalm 141:8a.

How about the other sister? Worrying. We all do it. Some more than others. But if we realize it's an affront to our God to worry, should we? One of Jesus' disciples, Peter, wrote later in his life this: Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. I Peter 5:7. I like to say I'm not a worrier, but I do get anxious at times--and that's worrying!

I hope I can remember those "sister sins" and remind myself I have the Lord of the Universe on my side and He does care for me! He cares for you, too, friend!

Wear My Peace

Wear My Peace grabbed my attention yesterday in my devotional reading. How often do we hustle and bustle about, thinking only about the next moment, the next day, next week, next month, next year? I certainly do. Notice the capital letters. My--the eternal, only God deserves the capital letter. Jesus told His disciples, Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you. The next capital: Peace. Jesus told His disciples again...Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. Only Jesus' peace will give that true peace.

Really? I can only speak from personal experience. I have had Peace in the most excrutiating times. I think God knew me best and brought these experiences into my life to help me learn to Wear His Peace. He gave me Peace when my marriage was in trouble. When they told me, "Your baby is dead." When my husband suffered a killing stroke. When they told me, "He's gone." When I sat in a faculty meeting and they said, "We're closing this school. You won't have a job after this school year." He gave me Peace in the happy, good times. Those good times seem even better after a hard time. They really do.

I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say I did not want to Wear My Peace when they told me my second husband was brain dead. But I've donned that Peace, for I've learned it's the best thing to do.

I've learned that to Wear My Peace in the good and bad times is better, though not always easy. Jesus was right when He said, Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. It is really true. Not just good--but better!!

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Enjoy the Peace only Jesus gives.

The Willamette Valley

Face the Fear

Make fear your friend. Fear is a reality. That's what I heard this morning as we listened to an athlete who participates in the "skeleton" an Olympic sledding competition. They went on to say you can either be paralyzed by it--or accept the fear and face it.

My fear is a natural one: OK--take a deep breath I say to myself--my fear is losing my husband. I will face that fact. Should I worry? Be anxious? Or do I enjoy the gift God has given me? I choose to face it. Enjoy my life as it is right now. To face my fear and enjoy my Jim, the man God--and only God--brought into my life!

The Olympic athletes face their fear as they plunge down the mountain slope. The bobsled track. The ice skating rink. Your fear is different. It may be losing your job. Losing money in a retirement account. Losing your battle with cancer. Your parent. Your spouse. Your home. Not belonging. Forgotten. Alone.

Many Scripture verses come to mind as we think about our fear. My favorite is in Deuteronomy 31:8 The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.

With Hope

This is not at all how
We thought it was supposed to be
We had so many plans for you
We had so many dreams.....

We can cry with hope
We can say goodbye with hope
'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end, oh no
And we can grieve with hope
'Cause we believe with hope
(There's a place by God's grace)
There's a place where we'll see your face again
We'll see your face again.....

We have this hope as an anchor
'Cause we believe that everything
God promised us is true, so ...

So we can cry with hope
And say goodbye with hope

We wait with hope
And we ache with hope
We hold on with hope

We let go with hope

(Words by Steven Curtis Chapman)

Eight years ago, I listened to these words. It was at the memorial service of Bill Rudberg. I couldn’t listen to this song after that service for a long time. But now I read the words and remember the melody and recall how God has worked in my life! How faithful He has been to me. Yes, there’ve been lots of tears and sadness. But much joy and love, too. 

That is the theme of my life. I can see how faithful God has been to me.....and how much hope is in my life. I wouldn’t be honest if I didn’t admit sometimes I wonder what’s around the next bend in the road, because loving brings hurt and sorrow. But for today, I will reflect on the hope God has given me and the many blessings He has surrounded me with. That will be enough. But now, Lord, what do I look for? My hope is in you.....(Psalm 39:7)

Rest in peace--for I know you are in the presence of our Savior, Jesus--George William Rudberg, Jr., 09-26-1943  -  02-03-2006. You were loved and are missed. But with full assurance, we will see you again. With hope.