An excerpt from Second Chances...At Life, At Love, With Hope

Dates are good things for they remind us what we have to do.  But they are also reminders of the past. Reminders of the sad parts in our life.

24 months ago on the 29th of December, Blair and I were winging our way home from the wonderful trip to South Africa.What a wonder that trip was--it was so fun on our three week road trip.I had Blair all to myself--and he me.We ate wonderful seafood.We drank good wine.    We frolicked in the Indian Ocean.We met new people, had new adventures. We made love like never before. We shared our most inmost thoughts. It was good. It was very, vey good. But it was time to come home. I was excited to return to my wonderful home. My bed. Use my bath. Everything! Indeed, it was exciting to return.

And yet, one month later, on January 29, little did I know that that day would be Blair’s last conscious day on earth. Yes, dates are wonderful---and dreadful----Yet without Christ’s dreadful crucifixion, there would be no resurrection. And without His resurrection, there would be no hope. But there is hope, for there was resurrection---and we only need to believe He died for me and rose for me so I might live. I have hope. Yes, hope. I have eternal life. Yes, hope to see my loved ones who trusted in Him. But the main event will be to be with Him, my hope in glory! 

Now I am looking at this date, December 29 seeing how near and dear my Lord and Savior has been to me. My heart no longer aches so much as I reflect on this date.....And that is good. That means God does what He promises.To heal our broken hearts and give us joy again. He has done that in me.

Praise God for dates---dreadful and beautiful......

Christmas Surprise

I was alone on Christmas morning for the first time in my life. I told myself I'd be ok. After all, I'd be with my family later in the morning--at church, and later at my house for dinner. I didn't have a special breakfast, the usual Special K with Protein, why would I make something special for just me?

I took myself to church and met my Vancouver family and that was good. We would be together later for dinner. I was a little sad that my son and his daughters wouldn't be there, but it wasn't possible this year, we would celebrate Christmas later in the week.

Then, just after cleaning up the table after a wonderful dinner of marinated turkey, a delicious green salad and the traditional green bean casserole with my homemade french bread, who walked in but my Todd? He came! It was great! He decided it was worth the three hour drive to be with his Vancouver family. I am blessed!

Brokenness

I had a wonderful, sad, excruciatingly painful evening last night. You see, my friend Judy (and many, many of her other friends, too) spent the evening with her. It was to be her bachelorette party before the big wedding day this coming Saturday. Instead, she was sharing with us the terrible loss of the sudden death of her son, Patrick. We still had the party. We did laugh--and cry--and laugh--and cry. The wedding will go on. But the terrible knots of emotions are churning within Judy, I'm sure.

Oh, it's so hard to watch and someone who is hurting so badly and it seems there is nothing to be done! I am beginning to understand how much people loved me when I was going through my losses. I must remind myself, Judy will be all right, though she must forge through deep water before she will be all right. The best possible thing I can do for her is pray, pray, pray.

We love you Judy. We care for you. I am grateful you haven't given up on the Savior, for He loves you best.

Tribute to Marian

Marian is my mother in law and I don't call her Marian, but mom. For she really is my mom. She was there when I married her son, Bill. Was waiting to hear what our firstborn was--a boy! She was  always ready to babysit--and loved both my kids with a passion!

Marian was an athlete and in this day and age, she most likely would have taken her girls' team to State. Instead, she just was able to practice with her brother who WAS a professional athlete! She spent countless hours catching his pitches. Then she moved on in her fifties, to catch my son's base balls. In her eighties, she played catch with her great grandkids, too.


Marian also loved to bake. It was almost an insult to her if you refused one (or multiple!) of her  goodies. So, we rarely refused! She was a party girl--she had countless birthday parties, anniversary celebrations and Christmas Eve dinners at her house. The house was sometimes comfortably large, other times, small but we all squeezed in just fine.

L to R, Emily, Marian, me, Annabel

I think Marian would like to mostly be remembered for her faith in Christ. She has been through much in her ninety years for today is her ninetieth! She is the only surviving family member in her immediate family. She had to say goodbye to her husband of 59 years, goodbye to her son, goodbye to sister and brother, yet her faith is still strong and bold.


May God bless you today--and in the life to come with Christ as I know He will! Happy birthday, Mom!!

Sunday Afternoon Surprise

The phone rang, and I heard Colleen's voice inviting me to join her to hear a piano recital from a renown pianist, Richard Goode.

Sundays are difficult for me sometimes. You see, I am by myself, and the best part of Sunday to me was worshipping at church in song and hearing Pastor Paul preach a good sermon with much to think about, and fellowshipping with other believers. After church, I'd have coffee with my sweetheart, then relax in the afternoon and just be together. Now that both of my mates are gone, the Sunday afternoons often are yawningly empty. So when I was invited to go to a concert to listen to one of my favorite instruments being played, it didn't take long for me to accept.

We had a great time yesterday, in the sunny afternoon, catching up on each other's lives. We found a parking spot not too far from the concert hall.

Colleen greeted many of her piano teaching friends, and colleagues as we walked into the hall. While we were waiting to purchase our tickets, someone asked us if we could use her extra two tickets? Could we? Of course! So with delight, we walked up the curvy stairs at Newmark Theatre, found our perfect seats and sat back to enjoy Mozart, Beethoven, and THEN, Chopin! A full half of the program was the flashy, exuberant Chopin--with two encores!

How blessed my Sunday was. A wonderful Sunday afternoon surprise!

God Doesn't Waste Sorrows

I purchased some bright golden chrysanthemums, some burgundy ones and harvest gold ones. Not because I needed them, necessarily, but I wanted them! What do I do with them? Well, I had some impatiens that welcomed my guests at the front door and they still looked pretty good, but I knew soon they would be hit by frost.

I can just throw them away and put the new flowers in the pots and these could be my welcome mat, I thought. That's great, but you need to know how difficult it is for me to throw plants away. I will try to nurse them back to good health.

I cringed and started pulling the plants out and tossed them in my yard debris bin. Then I had a thought: why not cut the remaining blossoms? So I did! And as I was cutting them, I was reminded of that phrase: God Doesn't Waste Sorrows.


In my great loss, I have tried to glean any lesson I am learning as I walk the road of grief. This seemed to me a prime example of a tiny human attempt at not wasting the "sorrow" of my dying plants for they are being used one last time.

So they grace my table with their pretty blooms and they remind me of that phrase yet again God Doesn't Waste Sorrows and He is not wasting mine!

Judy's Joy

Those who sow in tears 

Shall reap in joy,

He who continually goes forth weeping,

Bearing seed for sowing,

Shall doubtless come again with rejoicing

Bringing his sheaves with him.

Psalm 126:5-6 (NKJ)

Reading this Scripture last week reminded me of my friend, Judy.

Judy has radiated joy. She has had times where she had to sow tears through the seasons in her life. There has been the terrible pain of illness, betrayal in a marriage, loss of family in death, relationships that didn't turn out the way she expected. Through these very difficult times, Judy didn't wear the badge of bitterness and despair, but hope and joy! Yes, there were those weeping moments, yet God's Word promises us in spite of those tears, joy will come.

And now, she is reaping the joy with an anticipated marriage to Joe in less than a month. I rejoice with Judy in her anticipation of her wedding and new life with Joe. No matter what, though, she will have joy--for that comes from our loving Savior. Happy wedding, Judy.....and JOY!!!

Red leather jacket

The jacket makes a crinkly sound when I wear it. The sound reminds me of the person who gave it to me, my late husband, Bill. He has been gone now for nearly six years----can it be? Bill was a good and generous man. Every Christmas, he gave me a specially chosen item. Usually our daughter, Erika would go with him and help him pick it out. Money, within reason, was no object. 


My jacket is a classic style and is fairly timeless. That's good, because it's one of the last generous gifts he gave me on earth and I plan to keep it and wear it because it was from him.


When I wear it, people always say I look good. Is it the jacket? Or is it that I feel loved when I wear it? I think it's because I know the person who gave it to me, loved me very much.